3 months ago
Wait for when she compares arizona 😂 I love it 😂
3 months ago
The thorax. That’s where the heart resides. And in that heart often resides someone special.
I am from a very conservative family. One where arranged marriages are the norm. Anything else is just considered shameful and dishonoring the family name.
Despite living in America for over 20 years. Despite being educated here. Despite being given the *permission* to study medicine in a patriarchal society that still sees women as someone who belong in the kitchen. Despite having my own opinions I was never allowed to have my own identity. I was always “so-and-so’s daughter” and now “so-and-so’s daughter-in-law”. .
Yesterday I was speaking to my great uncle about how the kids in my family that were raised in America have been unfortunately given many more restrictions than the ones who grew up in Pakistan. We weren’t allowed to have friends growing up. My cousins in Pakistan however were allowed to have many friends and even go to their houses whenever they pleased. “We had no choice” he said. “We were forced to place those restrictions to preserve our identity and make sure it does not get lost”. And I understood this. They were afraid. And it’s reasonable for any immigrant to feel this way.
But is preserving their identity worth our happiness? We are told who we will be marrying and are expected to abide. If a tear rolls down an eye, it will eventually fade. We accept it as is and move on with our lives. We marry the people they pick for us despite having a clash in culture, language, opinions, and lifestyles. And it is very hard to break this cycle. Because they make you feel guilty. And cry in front of you. And act as though your refusal will tarnish their reputation in front of people. And bring shame to the family.
It’s time to break this cycle. One voice will speak for all. One voice will open the doors for many. It is always this one voice who has to face society head on and have to do the walk of shame. But it’s well worth it. This is one walk of shame I’m telling everyone to take. Because at the end awaits their happiness. And that’s what truly matters.